The other day, I got the BB broadcast message below:
"Gangs are placing a baby car seat by the road, with a fake baby in it, waiting for a woman (of course) to stop and check on the abandoned baby. Note that the location of this car seat is usually beside a wooded or grassy (field) area and the person (usually women) will be dragged into the woods, beaten, gang-raped and usually left dead.
If it's a man, they're usually beaten, robbed and maybe left dead too.
DO NOT STOP FOR ANY REASON. DIAL 767 AND REPORT WHAT YOU SAW, BUT DON'T EVEN SLOW DOWN.
If you are driving at night and eggs are thrown at your windscreen, do not stop to check the car. Do not operate the wiper and do not spray any water because eggs mixed with water become milky and block your vision up to 92.5% AND you are forced to stop beside the road and become a victim of these criminals.
Sometimes, they pretend to be accident victims and will prove you wrong the moment you get close enough to assist
These are all new techniques used by gangs. These are desperate times and there are unsavoury individuals who will take desperate measures to get what they want. Please pass this round to your loved ones"
I dialled 767 sha and the number doesn't exist.
2ndly, which statistician came up with the 92.5% figure?
3rdly, I don't know if these techniques are being practiced in Nigeria yet but it IS very possible.
I am usually wary of BB broadcast as a lot of them are filled with lies but I'm sure this one has plenty elements of truth in it. These days, the part of the Bible that says "the heart of man is DESPERATELY wicked" has become truer than ever! We hear all sorts of stories everyday of people committing various atrocities and I wonder if it was the same God that created those same people who commit unspeakable acts.
I feel so sad that I have become so wary of people. I feel molested. I feel like my innocence has been taken from me. It has been taken away, actually. I can hardly see a stranger and offer to help. Because you do not know who has lay a trap somewhere and who hasn't.
The kids on the street begging for alms, I hear they "submit" all the money they get to their master (usually an Alhaji). So these days, in traffic, I don't look at anybody's face.
The other day, one guy stopped me on the road begging me for money to buy medication, he even showed me a prescription supposedly written by a doctor. He told me his brother was sick and in the hospital and how he sold his phone to buy drugs. The amount he asked for was paltry (about N900 or so). I acknowledged that he might be lying and also acknowledged that it might be true. And in my opinion, N900 wasn't so much. After I gave him, I was warned to run away from such people because they could "charm" you into giving them everything you have. I never believed this charm story till it happened to someone close to me. She went into her mother's house and gave them ALL EXPENSIVE JEWELRY. Very long story.
The worst set are the "mothers with children". I always used to feel sorry for these ones and give them money. That was until I heard the story of how they rent babies to garner public sympathy!
After that, I quit! These people on the streets, you just never know. If I wanna help, I'd rather look for more deserving and "credible" recipients!
Friday, December 16, 2011
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Who Is Fooling Who?!
Sometimes, I see certain News headlines that just make me cringe and make my intestines recoil with/from rage. Some make me sad. Some make me laugh. Some leave me puzzled.
Item #1:
JAMB yesterday said it'll expend over N2bn in constructing prototype offices in the 36 states of the federation at the cost of N56m each.
Now tell me, how many secondary schools in Nigeria have a value of N56m or even half or quarter that amount? How many schools have a 10% value of that amount? No answers required.
This is the same JAMB that under admits students into poor quality schools who can't find jobs after graduation.
Item #2:
Akwa-Ibom teachers have decided to embark on strike following the alleged refusal of the state govt to pay their two months salary arrears.
Assuming there are 200 teachers in Akwa-Ibom state earning N50,000 monthly, that'll be N10m monthly. And we all know there can't be 200 teachers earning 50k. I'm jst doin best case scenario. Using best case, the govt would need N50m to pay 200 teachers in almost 6months. And that's the same amount being approved for "prototype Jamb offices". What will happen to the already existing ones? Putting the cart before the horse, taking out the tryres from the cart and feeding them to the horses till they die of poisoning is what our Govt is good at.
Item #3:
Sale of pubic Albino Hairs booms in Delta State. It is used for Jazz/Juju because albino hair is supposedly effective for love charm
Ewwwww!! Seriously! Lord have mercy!
Item #4:
"Nigerians spend an estimated N93.9bn monthly to buy airtime or recharge cards for their mobile phones and other mobile devices"
All I can do is wonder what percentage of my money makes up that figure!
Item #5:
"Over 300 ex-militants yesterday blocked parts of Oron-Eket road in Urue Offong of Akwa Ibom in protest over non-payment of their allowances"
Why should the Govt be responsible for the upkeep of able bodied men cum criminals? I don't just gerrit. Isn't it a wiser option to provide jobs for these men and pay them salaries instead of allowances. That way, unemployment/crime rate is reduced, these criminals get some sense of of responsibility that comes with having a job, the economy is further strengthened by job creation, disruption of economic activities by these "militants" is reduced, and most of all, they provide services to the public. Dashing them money does absolutely nothing. it's only a temporary solution to a permanent problem
Item #6:
War Against War Against Boko Haram: To protect the presidential villa and its environs, President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan has approved the sum of N5billion for the purchase of robotic bomb detectors for Aso Rock.
Need I say more? There are two issues here - the fact that it's 5billion and that they're taking extra steps to protect themselves without doing the same for the rest of us. Except you consider the CCTV cameras mounted everywhere within the Abuja metropolis which shows your face but doesn't help them locate you or where you live if the need arises. Sigh
Now, just heard that a mosque was bombed in Sapele by ex-Mend militants on the basis that Boko Haram has been killing their "southern brothers" in the North. Seriously? This can only worsen things for everybody! The most csualties in this Boko Haram madness have been northerners. Besides, so much for brotherhood, how many of them actually act "brotherly" in their home state?! Mschw
Who is fooling who???
Item #1:
JAMB yesterday said it'll expend over N2bn in constructing prototype offices in the 36 states of the federation at the cost of N56m each.
Now tell me, how many secondary schools in Nigeria have a value of N56m or even half or quarter that amount? How many schools have a 10% value of that amount? No answers required.
This is the same JAMB that under admits students into poor quality schools who can't find jobs after graduation.
Item #2:
Akwa-Ibom teachers have decided to embark on strike following the alleged refusal of the state govt to pay their two months salary arrears.
Assuming there are 200 teachers in Akwa-Ibom state earning N50,000 monthly, that'll be N10m monthly. And we all know there can't be 200 teachers earning 50k. I'm jst doin best case scenario. Using best case, the govt would need N50m to pay 200 teachers in almost 6months. And that's the same amount being approved for "prototype Jamb offices". What will happen to the already existing ones? Putting the cart before the horse, taking out the tryres from the cart and feeding them to the horses till they die of poisoning is what our Govt is good at.
Item #3:
Sale of pubic Albino Hairs booms in Delta State. It is used for Jazz/Juju because albino hair is supposedly effective for love charm
Ewwwww!! Seriously! Lord have mercy!
Item #4:
"Nigerians spend an estimated N93.9bn monthly to buy airtime or recharge cards for their mobile phones and other mobile devices"
All I can do is wonder what percentage of my money makes up that figure!
Item #5:
"Over 300 ex-militants yesterday blocked parts of Oron-Eket road in Urue Offong of Akwa Ibom in protest over non-payment of their allowances"
Why should the Govt be responsible for the upkeep of able bodied men cum criminals? I don't just gerrit. Isn't it a wiser option to provide jobs for these men and pay them salaries instead of allowances. That way, unemployment/crime rate is reduced, these criminals get some sense of of responsibility that comes with having a job, the economy is further strengthened by job creation, disruption of economic activities by these "militants" is reduced, and most of all, they provide services to the public. Dashing them money does absolutely nothing. it's only a temporary solution to a permanent problem
Item #6:
War Against War Against Boko Haram: To protect the presidential villa and its environs, President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan has approved the sum of N5billion for the purchase of robotic bomb detectors for Aso Rock.
Need I say more? There are two issues here - the fact that it's 5billion and that they're taking extra steps to protect themselves without doing the same for the rest of us. Except you consider the CCTV cameras mounted everywhere within the Abuja metropolis which shows your face but doesn't help them locate you or where you live if the need arises. Sigh
Now, just heard that a mosque was bombed in Sapele by ex-Mend militants on the basis that Boko Haram has been killing their "southern brothers" in the North. Seriously? This can only worsen things for everybody! The most csualties in this Boko Haram madness have been northerners. Besides, so much for brotherhood, how many of them actually act "brotherly" in their home state?! Mschw
Who is fooling who???
Labels:
Boko Haram,
Employment,
JAMB,
Mend,
Militants,
Nigeria
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Lagos Slave vs Abuja Princess
Jesus! I finally get to post something! Seems like I've been haunted for the past one week by Internet devils. Firstly,I wasn't able to use my phone browser for reasons only Etisalat understands. And then, my office Internet went crazy, I'm convinced it requires some form of excorcism! And now my BIS has kuku expired, so has my Starcomms subscription. Despite my very many Internet sources, I have been rendered internetless :-(
Bitter sweet? Thank God for this iPad that I haff borrow to post this.
Now that I finally have reasonably reliable access, I have lost the urge to say anything....but I will force myself to talk. I cannot waste this RARE *internet opportunity*
On to the highlight of my week - I got a job offer. It was like magic. I hadn't even officially asked God for another job. All I did was say it offhandedly and vavavoom, it came to me. The job offers DOUBLE what I currently earn and comes with a "motor car". A normal human being may jump at the offer instantly. More money! 100% more money! Not me.
As tempting as more money sounds (with my rent 3 months away), I have to be logical about this matter.
Firstly, it's totally different from anything I do or have ever done. Totally different line of work. 2ndly and MAJORLY, it's in LAGOS! That mad place. Whilst my one year NYSC stint in Lagos wasn't so bad, I don't think I can do it again after experiencing the sweetness and serenity in Abuja.
And the stress of having to move. Again! Na me waka pass?
I just realized I'm still undecided about the matter. My job in Abuja is mad flexible. I don't have a strict 9-5 routine, I have time that only an entrepreneur can dream of having. My office is 3mins away from my house. It's almost like heaven....except errrr it gets boring...for a restless person like me. I like to get constantly challenged mentally. This job doesn't give me that. What it gives is a steady salary and time.
New job will give MORE money and enough challenges to drive me mad. But. It's Lagos...I will instantly become a SLAVE.
I love Abuja. But Lagos will give me money.
Sigh. For love or money????!!!
Bitter sweet? Thank God for this iPad that I haff borrow to post this.
Now that I finally have reasonably reliable access, I have lost the urge to say anything....but I will force myself to talk. I cannot waste this RARE *internet opportunity*
On to the highlight of my week - I got a job offer. It was like magic. I hadn't even officially asked God for another job. All I did was say it offhandedly and vavavoom, it came to me. The job offers DOUBLE what I currently earn and comes with a "motor car". A normal human being may jump at the offer instantly. More money! 100% more money! Not me.
As tempting as more money sounds (with my rent 3 months away), I have to be logical about this matter.
Firstly, it's totally different from anything I do or have ever done. Totally different line of work. 2ndly and MAJORLY, it's in LAGOS! That mad place. Whilst my one year NYSC stint in Lagos wasn't so bad, I don't think I can do it again after experiencing the sweetness and serenity in Abuja.
And the stress of having to move. Again! Na me waka pass?
I just realized I'm still undecided about the matter. My job in Abuja is mad flexible. I don't have a strict 9-5 routine, I have time that only an entrepreneur can dream of having. My office is 3mins away from my house. It's almost like heaven....except errrr it gets boring...for a restless person like me. I like to get constantly challenged mentally. This job doesn't give me that. What it gives is a steady salary and time.
New job will give MORE money and enough challenges to drive me mad. But. It's Lagos...I will instantly become a SLAVE.
I love Abuja. But Lagos will give me money.
Sigh. For love or money????!!!
Friday, October 7, 2011
My Landlord & I
Jesus oh! I cannot believe I have not written anything in the past three months! This is the highest height of laziness!
In related news, I just realised that it's been a year (give or take) now since I started blogging. This year really has gone by so fast for some crazy reason.
Nothing major has happened to me in the last three months..except oh! I finally joined the blackberry train (I was forced into it) courtesy of my office. Infact I blame BBM for my long absence from blogger. Evil thing :-) :-(
So it's 6.30pm friday evening and I got so bored at home that I came back to the office. Who does that?
Ok, lemme not lie. It's not just boredom sha. But I cannot disclose the major reason *sticking tongue out*
Another reason I could not stay at home was because of my landlord. Hmm. Where do I begin?
In my desperation to get a house earlier this year, I sha just moved into the best available house I could find at that time. After moving in, I realised the place is amini major commercial centre.
It's a two-storey building with a gazillion tenants living in it. No, I'm not exaggerating, I swear. On the ground floor, there is one hair dressing salon (not bad for me and my lazy self), there is also a restaurant
(I do not eat there) AND there is a beer parlour! I do not drink beer!
When I wanted to get the house, it was afternoon all the times I went there so I didn't notice the "commerciality" of the place. Besides, even f I did, I'm not sure I would have minded considering how hard it is to get a house in Abuja and considering that it was right in the MIDDLE of town.
After moving in, my eyes opened to the reality of my situation. I made a few complaints and suggested that they at least put a (wooden) barricade between their beer place and the residential place. I feel assaulted every time I walk past on my way up to my house. They looked at me as if I was speaking chinese.
As it is with humans, nay, me, I somehow adapted to the madness. And my window is just by the drinking spot. But in the past one month, things have grown from bad to worstest. They have added a mini-bar to the beer parlour and now once it's 5pm, P-square comes on in the highest possible volume. And I think the music has also attracted more people and now the noise that comes in though my window is unbelievable.
The kind of people who come there are the ones who scream when supposedly conversing. And to make matters worse, there is no toilet built for this drinkers so they end up urinating on the wall outside the gate. The accumulated urine stench is unbelievable.
To make matters worse, my dad was in town for a couple of days this week and wanted to come see my house. The only time he was free was at night and I practically shooed him away just so he doesn't get all paranoid because of my environment. I made him come early in the morning instead, imagine!
The annoying part is that I paid A LOT OF MONEY for this "house". Even I still don't believe I coughed out that much for a house, talkless of this crap.
I just sha think it's very unfair. We are forced to pay so much money and yet treated like we have no say in our own house. And oh, the Landlord also lives in a flat downstairs. I keep complaining about the noise and I am told that I am not in Jand where they have noise control services.
Nigeria should pass a Noise Control Act or something. I sha know there is something called Abuja Environmental Protection Board (AEPB). I am thinking of reporting my landlord to them oh..............I mean, it is only fair abi? But then, I hear it's this same AEPB that goes around Abuja arresting young women on false accusations of prostitution.
What if I go to their office and they lock me up for prostitution *bbm confused face*
I just checked google and there is even an agency in 9ja, It's called Agency For The Control Of Noise Pollution (ACNP). Sounds like a political parry, lol. And oh my God, I found an article about them and this is what their priority is: http://www.wazobiareport.com/reports/Noise-control-agency-moves-to-ban-use-of-unnecessary-words
I can't shout.
I feel like this post is gerring too long, sorry oh..it's the boredom. It's gerring dark.....lemme walk back home. A lonnnnng, dry, boring weekend awaits me. I just hope Nepa is kind enough not to make it worse! If not, I just might spend it in this office!
In related news, I just realised that it's been a year (give or take) now since I started blogging. This year really has gone by so fast for some crazy reason.
Nothing major has happened to me in the last three months..except oh! I finally joined the blackberry train (I was forced into it) courtesy of my office. Infact I blame BBM for my long absence from blogger. Evil thing :-) :-(
So it's 6.30pm friday evening and I got so bored at home that I came back to the office. Who does that?
Ok, lemme not lie. It's not just boredom sha. But I cannot disclose the major reason *sticking tongue out*
Another reason I could not stay at home was because of my landlord. Hmm. Where do I begin?
In my desperation to get a house earlier this year, I sha just moved into the best available house I could find at that time. After moving in, I realised the place is a
It's a two-storey building with a gazillion tenants living in it. No, I'm not exaggerating, I swear. On the ground floor, there is one hair dressing salon (not bad for me and my lazy self), there is also a restaurant
(I do not eat there) AND there is a beer parlour! I do not drink beer!
When I wanted to get the house, it was afternoon all the times I went there so I didn't notice the "commerciality" of the place. Besides, even f I did, I'm not sure I would have minded considering how hard it is to get a house in Abuja and considering that it was right in the MIDDLE of town.
After moving in, my eyes opened to the reality of my situation. I made a few complaints and suggested that they at least put a (wooden) barricade between their beer place and the residential place. I feel assaulted every time I walk past on my way up to my house. They looked at me as if I was speaking chinese.
As it is with humans, nay, me, I somehow adapted to the madness. And my window is just by the drinking spot. But in the past one month, things have grown from bad to worstest. They have added a mini-bar to the beer parlour and now once it's 5pm, P-square comes on in the highest possible volume. And I think the music has also attracted more people and now the noise that comes in though my window is unbelievable.
The kind of people who come there are the ones who scream when supposedly conversing. And to make matters worse, there is no toilet built for this drinkers so they end up urinating on the wall outside the gate. The accumulated urine stench is unbelievable.
To make matters worse, my dad was in town for a couple of days this week and wanted to come see my house. The only time he was free was at night and I practically shooed him away just so he doesn't get all paranoid because of my environment. I made him come early in the morning instead, imagine!
The annoying part is that I paid A LOT OF MONEY for this "house". Even I still don't believe I coughed out that much for a house, talkless of this crap.
I just sha think it's very unfair. We are forced to pay so much money and yet treated like we have no say in our own house. And oh, the Landlord also lives in a flat downstairs. I keep complaining about the noise and I am told that I am not in Jand where they have noise control services.
Nigeria should pass a Noise Control Act or something. I sha know there is something called Abuja Environmental Protection Board (AEPB). I am thinking of reporting my landlord to them oh..............I mean, it is only fair abi? But then, I hear it's this same AEPB that goes around Abuja arresting young women on false accusations of prostitution.
What if I go to their office and they lock me up for prostitution *bbm confused face*
I just checked google and there is even an agency in 9ja, It's called Agency For The Control Of Noise Pollution (ACNP). Sounds like a political parry, lol. And oh my God, I found an article about them and this is what their priority is: http://www.wazobiareport.com/reports/Noise-control-agency-moves-to-ban-use-of-unnecessary-words
I can't shout.
I feel like this post is gerring too long, sorry oh..it's the boredom. It's gerring dark.....lemme walk back home. A lonnnnng, dry, boring weekend awaits me. I just hope Nepa is kind enough not to make it worse! If not, I just might spend it in this office!
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Nigeria: A Cashless Society?
One thing about us - we like to copy! And the newest thing in Nigeria is this lofty dream of making it a cashless society. Yes, I said lofty. Sue me!
Sure, living in a cashless society does have its perks. But I honestly do not think Nigerians are ready or equipped for the technicalities that come with it.
Uncle Sanusi, how far na?
Last I checked, Nigeria and America no dey the same level.
For starters, they have steady electricity and access to the internet. Transiting from a cash-based society to a cashless one means falling back on technology. It means human capital will be replaced with machines. Most, if not all machines require to use of electricity. Nigeria is nowhere near having steady electricity so wouldn't this be a case of putting the cart before the horse?
I read that some 300 Zenith Bank IT staff were sacked yesterday and the next set on the chopping board will be the bulk counters. Reason is, when we transit to a cashless society, we would no longer have need for those whose jobs are to count money.
For a country with a staggering rate of unemployment, it only gets worse.
From December 2011, CBN has mandated that it will restrict individual withdrawals to N150,000. Anybody who withdraws above the said amount will be charged N100 for every 1,000 exceeded by the limit. Seriously?! It is now a crime to withdraw your own money.
I read a Thisday columnist complain about her bank charging her because she gave someone a cheque for N50,000 and their justification was that she could have done an internet transfer instead. They conveniently assumed she had access to the internet and access to electricity for that matter.
As we speak, there are still villages in Nigeria that have no access to electricity. There are people who have never even seen a computer before talkless of knowing what the internet is.
What will happen is people will now start keeping large sums of money under their beds and armed robber will get enough motivation to remain in their trade.
Ordinary ATM that we use has caused enough wahala with lack of appropriate security measures employed by these banks. This new cashless society theory will be sure to see more yahoo boys repeatedly smiling to the banks.
Imagine doing something as simple as withdrawing cash from the ATM and having your bank debit your account twice and in some cases, not even dispensing cash at all. I remember when I wanted to pay my rent. The lawyer refused to accept a cheque for some odd reason. So i was left with the option of paying cash - I had to get some cash from the ATM to add to what I had already. I was about to make the last withdrawal of N20,000 and the cash wasn't dispensed yet I got a debit alert instantly.
I almost went crazy because I was working with a timeline - if I didn't pay for the house that day, someone else could take it and the lawyer was already waiting for me. I became almost frantic. I went into the bank whose ATM I had used and the Customer Service person looked at me sympathetically and said there was nothing he could do and instructed me to go clarify the issue with my bank
I got to my bank and they told me it could take up to 10 working days!!! 10days!! Why do I have to wait 2 weeks for an error caused by them. I wasalmost livid. I had to run around like a mad woman looking for where to borrow 20k because I had no other money.
This has happened to me more than once and I know a million people that have gone through similar situations. It's funny but I am beginning to suspect these banks do this deliberately.
Imagine if 100,000 Nigerians suffer this same thing everyday. And let's assume the amount is N20,000.
100,000 Nigerians X 20,000 = 2 billion Naira
And in most cases, they end up not giving you back your cash till 10 working days elapse.
Imagine what a bank can do with 2 billion Naira in 2 weeks. They could trade with that money and make insane interests in 2 weeks.
After they "borrow" 2 billion Naira from unsuspecting Nigerians, they give it back to us with 0% and we are supposed to go home smiling. Go and try to borrow money from your bank and hear the mad interest rates they'll give you.
So this issue of islamic banking (non-interest lending) didn't just crop up. They've been practicing it with unsuspecting customers since the beginning of time. Greedy people.
Mr Sanusi should know this though: Becoming a supposedly cashless society isn't going to make Nigeria one of the 20 most developed nations in the world as is his aim. Not even close.
Sure, living in a cashless society does have its perks. But I honestly do not think Nigerians are ready or equipped for the technicalities that come with it.
Uncle Sanusi, how far na?
Last I checked, Nigeria and America no dey the same level.
For starters, they have steady electricity and access to the internet. Transiting from a cash-based society to a cashless one means falling back on technology. It means human capital will be replaced with machines. Most, if not all machines require to use of electricity. Nigeria is nowhere near having steady electricity so wouldn't this be a case of putting the cart before the horse?
I read that some 300 Zenith Bank IT staff were sacked yesterday and the next set on the chopping board will be the bulk counters. Reason is, when we transit to a cashless society, we would no longer have need for those whose jobs are to count money.
For a country with a staggering rate of unemployment, it only gets worse.
From December 2011, CBN has mandated that it will restrict individual withdrawals to N150,000. Anybody who withdraws above the said amount will be charged N100 for every 1,000 exceeded by the limit. Seriously?! It is now a crime to withdraw your own money.
I read a Thisday columnist complain about her bank charging her because she gave someone a cheque for N50,000 and their justification was that she could have done an internet transfer instead. They conveniently assumed she had access to the internet and access to electricity for that matter.
As we speak, there are still villages in Nigeria that have no access to electricity. There are people who have never even seen a computer before talkless of knowing what the internet is.
What will happen is people will now start keeping large sums of money under their beds and armed robber will get enough motivation to remain in their trade.
Ordinary ATM that we use has caused enough wahala with lack of appropriate security measures employed by these banks. This new cashless society theory will be sure to see more yahoo boys repeatedly smiling to the banks.
Imagine doing something as simple as withdrawing cash from the ATM and having your bank debit your account twice and in some cases, not even dispensing cash at all. I remember when I wanted to pay my rent. The lawyer refused to accept a cheque for some odd reason. So i was left with the option of paying cash - I had to get some cash from the ATM to add to what I had already. I was about to make the last withdrawal of N20,000 and the cash wasn't dispensed yet I got a debit alert instantly.
I almost went crazy because I was working with a timeline - if I didn't pay for the house that day, someone else could take it and the lawyer was already waiting for me. I became almost frantic. I went into the bank whose ATM I had used and the Customer Service person looked at me sympathetically and said there was nothing he could do and instructed me to go clarify the issue with my bank
I got to my bank and they told me it could take up to 10 working days!!! 10days!! Why do I have to wait 2 weeks for an error caused by them. I was
This has happened to me more than once and I know a million people that have gone through similar situations. It's funny but I am beginning to suspect these banks do this deliberately.
Imagine if 100,000 Nigerians suffer this same thing everyday. And let's assume the amount is N20,000.
100,000 Nigerians X 20,000 = 2 billion Naira
And in most cases, they end up not giving you back your cash till 10 working days elapse.
Imagine what a bank can do with 2 billion Naira in 2 weeks. They could trade with that money and make insane interests in 2 weeks.
After they "borrow" 2 billion Naira from unsuspecting Nigerians, they give it back to us with 0% and we are supposed to go home smiling. Go and try to borrow money from your bank and hear the mad interest rates they'll give you.
So this issue of islamic banking (non-interest lending) didn't just crop up. They've been practicing it with unsuspecting customers since the beginning of time. Greedy people.
Mr Sanusi should know this though: Becoming a supposedly cashless society isn't going to make Nigeria one of the 20 most developed nations in the world as is his aim. Not even close.
Monday, July 25, 2011
God Bless The Broken Road
I set out on a narrow road many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God bless the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent, just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost, and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there, you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that's coming true
I love love love this song by Rascal Flatts. I keep rehearsing with it for the day it'll finally be true for me. Yeah, you could call it a "faith song" perhaps.
The writer of this song talks about how every heart break he ever had led him to his true love.
For me though, this song has a deeper meaning and goes beyond heartbreak and love.
The Broken Road signifies a place of wilderness. It is a place where everything seems to be going wrong. It is a place of sickness, poverty, frustration, sin, unemployment, dissatisfaction with life etc etc.
The Broken Road is not a nice road to go through. It is filled with rough bumps and potholes as big as gullies. It is never a smooth ride on the Broken Road. The bumps on this road keep tossing you back and forth, left and right. And if you are like me who gets car sick sometimes, this road will be your biggest nightmare.
When you are on the this road, the word 'temptation' comes alive in its full dimension. Ever wondered why satan always appears when we are at our weakest? When Jesus went up to the wilderness to fast for 40 days and nights, that was when satan decided he was best for him to be tempted. Because he knew Jesus was fasting and hadn't eaten food, he decided to capitalize on that by tempting him to turn stones to bread.
And he hasn't stopped since then. He's still very much in the business of tempting God's children. And guess when the idiot shows up? When we are at our weakest - when bumps and potholes are bouncing us up and down, left and right, sideways and upside down.
But the Broken Road is also a place of brokenness - it breaks you to the point where you can't help but cry out to God to change your situation. And when you get to that point where you are broken before God, that's where healing and restoration begins. That's where miracles happen.
Remember the woman with the issue of blood? She had been suffering in her own pool of blood for 12 years. 12 years no be beans. I have spent 2 weeks in the hospital before and it felt like eternity. Imagine being sick for 12 whole years! He blood was her Broken Road. And then one day, she heard Jesus was passing through and I guess she had reached her limit by then, she had gotten to the point where she could not bare it any more - the point of brokenness. And she said to herself "Omo, today this thing go end!" And through the crowd, despite the near impossibility, she touched the hem of His garment.
You see, this woman was desperate for a healing. She was broken. And this propelled her to get her miracle. And we know the rest.
God has been so faithful to me in 2011. I have a lot going for me this year that I could never have fathomed will happen to me a year ago. I moved to a town where I practically knew nobody and He just started blessing me in ways I never expected. Things that other people struggle years for, He gave them to me in a blink of an eye without any stress. The beautiful thing is, I was on the Broken Road last year. And my Broken Road has led me to my place of restoration.
I am not where I wanna be but mehn, I am so far ahead from where I used to be. I sit down and think back about all the pain I went through last year and I'm happy I went through all that pain. If I hadn't, I would still be living my life normally (not walking towards my purpose).
But thank God for His Grace! My Broken Road has led me to my place of purpose. It has led me to the REASON I was created. I haven't fully fulfilled that purpose yet. But I have started. And I couldn't be any happier. I can't stop being grateful to my God - The Restorer of Broken Roads.
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God bless the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent, just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost, and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there, you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that's coming true
I love love love this song by Rascal Flatts. I keep rehearsing with it for the day it'll finally be true for me. Yeah, you could call it a "faith song" perhaps.
The writer of this song talks about how every heart break he ever had led him to his true love.
For me though, this song has a deeper meaning and goes beyond heartbreak and love.
The Broken Road signifies a place of wilderness. It is a place where everything seems to be going wrong. It is a place of sickness, poverty, frustration, sin, unemployment, dissatisfaction with life etc etc.
The Broken Road is not a nice road to go through. It is filled with rough bumps and potholes as big as gullies. It is never a smooth ride on the Broken Road. The bumps on this road keep tossing you back and forth, left and right. And if you are like me who gets car sick sometimes, this road will be your biggest nightmare.
When you are on the this road, the word 'temptation' comes alive in its full dimension. Ever wondered why satan always appears when we are at our weakest? When Jesus went up to the wilderness to fast for 40 days and nights, that was when satan decided he was best for him to be tempted. Because he knew Jesus was fasting and hadn't eaten food, he decided to capitalize on that by tempting him to turn stones to bread.
And he hasn't stopped since then. He's still very much in the business of tempting God's children. And guess when the idiot shows up? When we are at our weakest - when bumps and potholes are bouncing us up and down, left and right, sideways and upside down.
But the Broken Road is also a place of brokenness - it breaks you to the point where you can't help but cry out to God to change your situation. And when you get to that point where you are broken before God, that's where healing and restoration begins. That's where miracles happen.
Remember the woman with the issue of blood? She had been suffering in her own pool of blood for 12 years. 12 years no be beans. I have spent 2 weeks in the hospital before and it felt like eternity. Imagine being sick for 12 whole years! He blood was her Broken Road. And then one day, she heard Jesus was passing through and I guess she had reached her limit by then, she had gotten to the point where she could not bare it any more - the point of brokenness. And she said to herself "Omo, today this thing go end!" And through the crowd, despite the near impossibility, she touched the hem of His garment.
You see, this woman was desperate for a healing. She was broken. And this propelled her to get her miracle. And we know the rest.
God has been so faithful to me in 2011. I have a lot going for me this year that I could never have fathomed will happen to me a year ago. I moved to a town where I practically knew nobody and He just started blessing me in ways I never expected. Things that other people struggle years for, He gave them to me in a blink of an eye without any stress. The beautiful thing is, I was on the Broken Road last year. And my Broken Road has led me to my place of restoration.
I am not where I wanna be but mehn, I am so far ahead from where I used to be. I sit down and think back about all the pain I went through last year and I'm happy I went through all that pain. If I hadn't, I would still be living my life normally (not walking towards my purpose).
But thank God for His Grace! My Broken Road has led me to my place of purpose. It has led me to the REASON I was created. I haven't fully fulfilled that purpose yet. But I have started. And I couldn't be any happier. I can't stop being grateful to my God - The Restorer of Broken Roads.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
God Won't Clean Our Airports!
So the other weekend, I had to take a short trip home to see my mama and dada. I get to the ticket counter and I'm informed that I have to pay an extra thousand naira without explaining to me why. And the very rude "counter man" rudely told me it wasn't compulsory but he'd advise me to pay the fee. I asked him why I should pay when I do not know what I'm paying for.
I sha carried my bag and proceeded to enter the departure lounge. There comes this woman who says I can't get in till I pay for ***scrambled English I couldn't figure out**
And I asked aloud what **the thing** is and she says I should go back to my airline to get it without trying to explain what it is.
I go back to the airline I'm flying with and the counter man gave me a I-told-you-so look, very annoying! I just sha gave him the 1k because I was too tired and I obviously wasn't gonna get in without it.
It was a little ticket with "Passenger Service Charge" written on it. As was indicated, it was a FAAN (Federal Airports Authority of Nigeria) "initiative"! How the word "initiative" is grossly misused in Nigeria beats me.
I was sooooooooo angry! Surely, my anger was justified. With this silent anger, the screening lady tells me to take off my shoes before I pass through. I ordinarily wouldn't mind this except ermmm a thousand people before me just passed without even dropping their bags, having "settled" the screening lady!
Which kain country be this? That was all I kept asking myself. I grudgingly took off my shoes and the detector still beeped anyway. She wasn't even bothered. Some months ago, we took off belts, wristwatches, you name it and now, they really can't be bothered. Inconsistency really is our watchword in Nigeria.
And now, to the thing that REALLY made me ANGRY. So angry that, 2 weeks later, I'm still very irked about the issue. It was a Friday and the departure lounge was jammed with people waiting for their flights. At the point I was there, there were no less than 500 people in there. And this is me trying to be conservative with figures.
The accountant in me quickly did the Math - N1,000 X 500 people = N500,000
Obviously, over a thousand people had travelled from that airport on that day alone. But what I was concerned with was the people are I could currently see. At that point, FAAN was N500k richer and yet we were dying inside heat. I was afraid to yawn because I was scared cobwebs would fall inside my mouth. More than half the very dirty ceiling fans were not working. Ventilation was almost zero. In this day and age, ABUJA AIRPORT still uses louvres! Not just louvres but very very very dirty half-broken ones.
Let's not talk about the horrible toilets! No, God, no!!
By the way, why do all those airport female voices that make the announcements sound so annoying - like nails on a chalkboard? Just wondering.......
There were a handful of air-conditioning units and none were working. If this were Benin Airport, maybe I wouldn't have been so angry. And by the way, Benin has the worst airport I have ever seen in my entire life. I flew through there once and I almost thought I was in a dream...
Anyways, back to the airport in Nigeria's CAPITAL City - I looked around the airport and everybody seemed normal. Was I the only mad person here??
The sad thing about Nigeria is that ABNORMAL things have become the NORM. Doesn't that make us mad people? We see kids hawking pure water by 11am on a Monday morning and it's normal...
Now, 1k isn't too much money. But if FAAN makes up to a million naira everyday just from Abuja Airport, surely we should be entitled to clean toilets, air conditioning, or atleast fans that work.
This airport thing sha has me going mad. Someone in my office was talking about it today and my feelings of anger have been resurrected. Somebody, somewhere will just sit down and his or her office and devise a way to chop free money and we have no say in the matter. As if the air fares (which they increase per second) isn't high enough!
May God save us! But we can also make some small human effort(s) to save ourselves. As powerful as God is, He isn't gonna come down and build clean airports for us!
I sha carried my bag and proceeded to enter the departure lounge. There comes this woman who says I can't get in till I pay for ***scrambled English I couldn't figure out**
And I asked aloud what **the thing** is and she says I should go back to my airline to get it without trying to explain what it is.
I go back to the airline I'm flying with and the counter man gave me a I-told-you-so look, very annoying! I just sha gave him the 1k because I was too tired and I obviously wasn't gonna get in without it.
It was a little ticket with "Passenger Service Charge" written on it. As was indicated, it was a FAAN (Federal Airports Authority of Nigeria) "initiative"! How the word "initiative" is grossly misused in Nigeria beats me.
I was sooooooooo angry! Surely, my anger was justified. With this silent anger, the screening lady tells me to take off my shoes before I pass through. I ordinarily wouldn't mind this except ermmm a thousand people before me just passed without even dropping their bags, having "settled" the screening lady!
Which kain country be this? That was all I kept asking myself. I grudgingly took off my shoes and the detector still beeped anyway. She wasn't even bothered. Some months ago, we took off belts, wristwatches, you name it and now, they really can't be bothered. Inconsistency really is our watchword in Nigeria.
And now, to the thing that REALLY made me ANGRY. So angry that, 2 weeks later, I'm still very irked about the issue. It was a Friday and the departure lounge was jammed with people waiting for their flights. At the point I was there, there were no less than 500 people in there. And this is me trying to be conservative with figures.
The accountant in me quickly did the Math - N1,000 X 500 people = N500,000
Obviously, over a thousand people had travelled from that airport on that day alone. But what I was concerned with was the people are I could currently see. At that point, FAAN was N500k richer and yet we were dying inside heat. I was afraid to yawn because I was scared cobwebs would fall inside my mouth. More than half the very dirty ceiling fans were not working. Ventilation was almost zero. In this day and age, ABUJA AIRPORT still uses louvres! Not just louvres but very very very dirty half-broken ones.
Let's not talk about the horrible toilets! No, God, no!!
By the way, why do all those airport female voices that make the announcements sound so annoying - like nails on a chalkboard? Just wondering.......
There were a handful of air-conditioning units and none were working. If this were Benin Airport, maybe I wouldn't have been so angry. And by the way, Benin has the worst airport I have ever seen in my entire life. I flew through there once and I almost thought I was in a dream...
Anyways, back to the airport in Nigeria's CAPITAL City - I looked around the airport and everybody seemed normal. Was I the only mad person here??
The sad thing about Nigeria is that ABNORMAL things have become the NORM. Doesn't that make us mad people? We see kids hawking pure water by 11am on a Monday morning and it's normal...
Now, 1k isn't too much money. But if FAAN makes up to a million naira everyday just from Abuja Airport, surely we should be entitled to clean toilets, air conditioning, or atleast fans that work.
This airport thing sha has me going mad. Someone in my office was talking about it today and my feelings of anger have been resurrected. Somebody, somewhere will just sit down and his or her office and devise a way to chop free money and we have no say in the matter. As if the air fares (which they increase per second) isn't high enough!
May God save us! But we can also make some small human effort(s) to save ourselves. As powerful as God is, He isn't gonna come down and build clean airports for us!
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Convo With Mummy
Mum: How are you naw, howz work and how are your exams coming along?
Me: Fine oh, thank God!
Mum: Your birthday is on Thursday oh
Me: Oh jeez, thank you for reminding me. This is proof that you did not thief me from the hospital
Us: Laughter
Mum: Hmmm....you are getting old oh!
Me: Yes I know. Me sef, I am feeling old for the 1st time
Mum: And me sef I am feeling older. Pls hurry up abeg, I cannot wait
Me: Mummy take it easy naw. Afterall there are people who dont get married till they are 30yrs
Mum: God forbid! See what you are saying with your own mouth. Don't you know that words are very powerful. I cancel it in Jesus name!
Me: Amen
Mum: Please hurry up abeg, time is going..
Me: Yes ma. But I have to see the husband 1st naw
Mum: Are you looking for husband.
Me: Ehen naw, seriously sef.
Mum: Please dont look too hard abeg. Just select one. You are not in heaven.
Me: What has heaven got to do with this talk?
Mum: You are not in heaven so stop looking for a perfect man. It is only in heaven that you'll see angels
Me: Laughing uncontrollably
Mum: It is not a laughing matter oh!
Me: Ok mummy, no wahala. I will try not to look too hard
Mum: Ok naw. Take care
Mehn, how time flies. I cannot believe I just had the above conversation with my mother. This is the same woman that would not allow boys visit me at home when I was growing up. Even girls sef. If you so much as rubbed vaseline on your lips, she would pronounce you a "bad influence".
I remember once when "Hipstars" was reigning. My father bought hipstars for me and coincidentally, one mumu boy came to my house the next day to look for me. For no reason. After that, my mother was so furious, she decided it was because of the hipstars that's why boys were now beginning to have interest in me. Na so she ban me from wearing trousers. No joke. I was about 14yrs. I didnt wear trousers till I was in my 2nd year in the University.
So when I eventually had a boyfriend, it was hard for me to talk to my mum about man issues. The topic was almost sacred in my household. Until last year, when I was 23, that was when she started deciding I had won "man privileges". Now, I no dey hear word again. How ironic.
For her sake, I hope I marry sometime in this century. For her sake. And for the sake of my phone battery - so she doesn't run it down talking about the issue..
Lol....
Me: Fine oh, thank God!
Mum: Your birthday is on Thursday oh
Me: Oh jeez, thank you for reminding me. This is proof that you did not thief me from the hospital
Us: Laughter
Mum: Hmmm....you are getting old oh!
Me: Yes I know. Me sef, I am feeling old for the 1st time
Mum: And me sef I am feeling older. Pls hurry up abeg, I cannot wait
Me: Mummy take it easy naw. Afterall there are people who dont get married till they are 30yrs
Mum: God forbid! See what you are saying with your own mouth. Don't you know that words are very powerful. I cancel it in Jesus name!
Me: Amen
Mum: Please hurry up abeg, time is going..
Me: Yes ma. But I have to see the husband 1st naw
Mum: Are you looking for husband.
Me: Ehen naw, seriously sef.
Mum: Please dont look too hard abeg. Just select one. You are not in heaven.
Me: What has heaven got to do with this talk?
Mum: You are not in heaven so stop looking for a perfect man. It is only in heaven that you'll see angels
Me: Laughing uncontrollably
Mum: It is not a laughing matter oh!
Me: Ok mummy, no wahala. I will try not to look too hard
Mum: Ok naw. Take care
Mehn, how time flies. I cannot believe I just had the above conversation with my mother. This is the same woman that would not allow boys visit me at home when I was growing up. Even girls sef. If you so much as rubbed vaseline on your lips, she would pronounce you a "bad influence".
I remember once when "Hipstars" was reigning. My father bought hipstars for me and coincidentally, one mumu boy came to my house the next day to look for me. For no reason. After that, my mother was so furious, she decided it was because of the hipstars that's why boys were now beginning to have interest in me. Na so she ban me from wearing trousers. No joke. I was about 14yrs. I didnt wear trousers till I was in my 2nd year in the University.
So when I eventually had a boyfriend, it was hard for me to talk to my mum about man issues. The topic was almost sacred in my household. Until last year, when I was 23, that was when she started deciding I had won "man privileges". Now, I no dey hear word again. How ironic.
For her sake, I hope I marry sometime in this century. For her sake. And for the sake of my phone battery - so she doesn't run it down talking about the issue..
Lol....
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Making It A Tad Easier....
There's this very efficient guy we have in my office. Officially, he's employed as a cleaner but....he ends up doing a lot of all the other menial stuff..
I call him efficient because he's always punctual, always ready to work, never grumbling, very humble...he just has a gentle soul and I'm drawn in by his gentle and calm nature......sometimes I wish I could be THAT gentle and calm......I think I may have been made to be that way originally but somehow, life has just made me (passive)aggressive....not my fault, really!
I have this habit of wondering about people. I wonder about what their story is and why they are where they are or the way they are. I guess I like the headache in some weird sorta way.
So, as expected, I've been wondering about this gentle boy called Ezra. In my head, he couldn't be anymore than 22. or highest, 24. And I wondered what unfair thing could have possibly happened to him for him to end up this way.
I decided to engage him in a chat and I found out he left secondary school in 2005 - 6 years ago!! My sister left secondary school in 2005 and she's a 5th year med student.
Apparently, after he graduated, he went to driving school, worked as a driver etc etc. But at some point, he fell ill and had to stop working. He also has 3 siblings whom he takes care of ie pays their school fees! By the way, his salary is N15,000. Two of his siblings fees are N7,000 each and the other is N8,000. So in a term, he has to pay fees of N22,000.
N22,000 is very little money to some people. There are people who spend 100k on a bottle of champagne without even blinking. That's even going too far. A MAC powder is about 8,000. Now, that's someone's school fees. And oh, I forgot Brazilian hair...I hear even the fake ones cost as much as 15k! Anyways, if I start with the comparisons, I no go finish today.
I also found out he's 27years - older than me with 3 or 4yrs. And here I am, being called "ma" by someone who's old enough to be my elder brother. Who am I?
But like they say, that's how life is - unfair.
I dont even know what I'm writing anymore sef. But I just feel pained that people have to suffer. Not like that changes anything. Even the Bible confirms that there'll always be poverty. But does that make it ok?
Even though we know suffering and poverty cannot be totally extinguished, in our own little way, we all can do something to make it just a tad easier for those people whom we are more privileged than...
...... my thoughts are not very co-ordinated today...I've been having Malaria-ish feelings....I don't know if it's stress (My exams start in 5days, Jesus!) or if it's Malaria. In 9ja, we are always quick to call every illness malaria....anyways........be back when my head is in order..
I call him efficient because he's always punctual, always ready to work, never grumbling, very humble...he just has a gentle soul and I'm drawn in by his gentle and calm nature......sometimes I wish I could be THAT gentle and calm......I think I may have been made to be that way originally but somehow, life has just made me (passive)aggressive....not my fault, really!
I have this habit of wondering about people. I wonder about what their story is and why they are where they are or the way they are. I guess I like the headache in some weird sorta way.
So, as expected, I've been wondering about this gentle boy called Ezra. In my head, he couldn't be anymore than 22. or highest, 24. And I wondered what unfair thing could have possibly happened to him for him to end up this way.
I decided to engage him in a chat and I found out he left secondary school in 2005 - 6 years ago!! My sister left secondary school in 2005 and she's a 5th year med student.
Apparently, after he graduated, he went to driving school, worked as a driver etc etc. But at some point, he fell ill and had to stop working. He also has 3 siblings whom he takes care of ie pays their school fees! By the way, his salary is N15,000. Two of his siblings fees are N7,000 each and the other is N8,000. So in a term, he has to pay fees of N22,000.
N22,000 is very little money to some people. There are people who spend 100k on a bottle of champagne without even blinking. That's even going too far. A MAC powder is about 8,000. Now, that's someone's school fees. And oh, I forgot Brazilian hair...I hear even the fake ones cost as much as 15k! Anyways, if I start with the comparisons, I no go finish today.
I also found out he's 27years - older than me with 3 or 4yrs. And here I am, being called "ma" by someone who's old enough to be my elder brother. Who am I?
But like they say, that's how life is - unfair.
I dont even know what I'm writing anymore sef. But I just feel pained that people have to suffer. Not like that changes anything. Even the Bible confirms that there'll always be poverty. But does that make it ok?
Even though we know suffering and poverty cannot be totally extinguished, in our own little way, we all can do something to make it just a tad easier for those people whom we are more privileged than...
...... my thoughts are not very co-ordinated today...I've been having Malaria-ish feelings....I don't know if it's stress (My exams start in 5days, Jesus!) or if it's Malaria. In 9ja, we are always quick to call every illness malaria....anyways........be back when my head is in order..
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Do Mad Men Dream?
I was walking on the road the other day and I saw a mad man fast asleep on a Nepa pole. Well, not the pole itself but "the thing" that keeps the pole in place.
Anyways, a thought suddenly struck me and I wonder(ed) if mad men have dreams. What do they dream about? Do they have nightmares? In their dreams, are they sane or still insane?
When they wake up, do they remember these dreams?
It's very possible that mad men have dreams. They might even have a dream where the cure for cancer is discovered. Who knows? A mad man may have the answers to the world's biggest problems. But I guess we'll never know...
So, I decided to turn to the world's biggest ITK (I-too-know) that always has answers to even the silliest questions.
Enter www.google.com.
Trust google, while trying to find answers to a silly question, a million other silly related questions will pop up. I saw questions like: Do blind people have dreams? Do dogs have dreams? Apparently, there are plenty crase people in this world.
So I asked google if lunatics have dreams and I couldn't/have not been able to get a definite answer. Google don fall my hand. I guess I might just have to ask a psychiatrist. Or ask a mad man :-D
Or just wonder forever.
By the way, a big yaaaaayyy to one of the major highlights of this month - Manchester United winning the Premiership Title for the 19th time. Yaaaay! The smile on Uncle Alex's face is just priceless....
Looking forward to this Saturday with Barcelona when we'll hopefully win the Champions' League.
If When that happens, I just might tear dress and enter road :-D
And to my song of the week. It's by Brandi Carlile and is titled "Hiding My Heart Away".
Anyways, a thought suddenly struck me and I wonder(ed) if mad men have dreams. What do they dream about? Do they have nightmares? In their dreams, are they sane or still insane?
When they wake up, do they remember these dreams?
It's very possible that mad men have dreams. They might even have a dream where the cure for cancer is discovered. Who knows? A mad man may have the answers to the world's biggest problems. But I guess we'll never know...
So, I decided to turn to the world's biggest ITK (I-too-know) that always has answers to even the silliest questions.
Enter www.google.com.
Trust google, while trying to find answers to a silly question, a million other silly related questions will pop up. I saw questions like: Do blind people have dreams? Do dogs have dreams? Apparently, there are plenty crase people in this world.
So I asked google if lunatics have dreams and I couldn't/have not been able to get a definite answer. Google don fall my hand. I guess I might just have to ask a psychiatrist. Or ask a mad man :-D
Or just wonder forever.
By the way, a big yaaaaayyy to one of the major highlights of this month - Manchester United winning the Premiership Title for the 19th time. Yaaaay! The smile on Uncle Alex's face is just priceless....
Looking forward to this Saturday with Barcelona when we'll hopefully win the Champions' League.
And to my song of the week. It's by Brandi Carlile and is titled "Hiding My Heart Away".
Very apt.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Gaddemit!!
I have a crush on somborri....
Imagine.....
As old as I am......crushing like I'm in secondary school...
Maybe it's a little more than a crush...but then, I choose to call it a crush..bcos that's what it should be...
But this crush is getting crushier....bcos we kissed.....I had hoped the kiss would be terrible so the crush will die a natural death...
But gaddemit, it was sooooooog goood! Why!
Now, I'm sitting here at werk and I'm thinking of him......gadddemit!!
And smiling too, gaddemit!!
Imagine.....
As old as I am......crushing like I'm in secondary school...
Maybe it's a little more than a crush...but then, I choose to call it a crush..bcos that's what it should be...
But this crush is getting crushier....bcos we kissed.....I had hoped the kiss would be terrible so the crush will die a natural death...
But gaddemit, it was sooooooog goood! Why!
Now, I'm sitting here at werk and I'm thinking of him......gadddemit!!
And smiling too, gaddemit!!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
May Is Here, Yayyy!!
Today is the first day of May and I feel great. The sermon preached by my pastor (Managing Your Finances) was awesome. According to him, sometimes what we need isn’t necessarily more money but how to manage the money we already have. He talked about most people (especially in Abuja) living beyond their means and living fake lives all in a bid to “impress”. He talked about girls who have three phones, make their (brazillian) hair on credit, buy clothes on credit and yet do not have money to pay their rent. He also talked about staying away from debt except unavoidable and how important it is to prioritise. It really was a great time in God’s presence. I haven’t paid my tithe this year. The first two months were beyond my control but what happened to March and April? For someone who is (was?) passionate about giving to God, I really am disappointed in myself. But thank God for His grace. He continues to bless me even in my foolishness. I am definitely gonna restart my tithe paying.
Apart from the awesome church service, I felt/feel great about this month. Some days ago, I already drew up a time-table of what my life is going to be like this month. It includes serious praying and fasting for the whole month, exercising atleast 30 minutes everyday, staying off carbohydrates (rice, garri and co), staying off red meat, staying off SHAWARMA (Oh God please help!), studying for my ACCA exams (a month away!) for a minimum of 6hrs everyday, sleeping for not more than 6hrs everyday, etc etc.
On my way back from church, I passed by an accident scene and all I could do was shout “Jesus!”. It wasn’t a nice sight. Two cars had collided, one of d cars hit a street light, it was so badly damaged I shudder to think of what could have happened to its occupants. It’s amazing how I had passed this same junction on my way to church just three hours ago. I said a silent prayer for the accident victims and hope no life was lost.
It’s very easy for us to slip into our different everyday routines and take for granted the grace and mercy that God doesn’t get tired of showering on us. Every trip in and out of my house is a miracle. It isn’t even something that should be taken for granted, regardless of how little it may seem.
I stopped a few metres from my house to buy food (I’ve been too busy to cook, God help me!) and during my short waka back home, I saw a man eating out of bags that were obviously taken out of the dumpster. Yet there I was, holding a nicely cooked plate of beans and plantain. Why don’t I eat out of dumpsters? Am I too righteous? No! Am I too upright? No! It’s just by His never-failing Grace..
But then, I’m thinking, those who eat out of dumpsters, the people who were involved in that accident today, are they any less righteous? Any less deserving? The people who were recently killed by natural disasters in Japan and America, were they any less deserving than us here in Nigeria? I always fall back into these rhetorical questions..I wonder why. All in all sha, these things just make me appreciate God all the more and His Covering over my life despite my shortcomings and weaknesses..
On the flip side, my aproko side couldn’t help but notice the girl that sat next to me in church wore a pair of knee-high winter boots! As in!! Inside this hot Abuja sun where it’d be perfectly justifiable to tear out ur skin because of heat, some others choose to wear knee-high winter boots, sheesh! And there was a girl that sat behind me that said “Praise GAD” atleast 100 times…I was tempted to turn back and atleast look at her face! AND the one that I just don’t understand – there were a couple of people shouting “LUYAH” instead of “HALLELUIA”!
Maybe I’m just old skool, but someone saying luyah instead of Halleluia is just plain….(what’s the word??!) Is it part of the efizzi to sound cool or is it just plain laziness to pronounce words in full? Or maybe we should blame it on Blackberries that have facilitated the shortening of just about everything. Even “In Jesus Name” is now IJN. Smh. It might just be me being old fashioned but if every word should be abbreviated, no wahala but please please please, leave religion out of it…surely, that’s possible….
And I’m sad Manchester United lost the game today at this very critical period…dashing 3 points to that yeye Arsenal…I’m not happy…but I’m keeping hope alive…we can still win the Premiership this season, Amen!
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Free Popcorn + Sprite
So the other day, I went to Silverbird to see a movie (No Strings Attached with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman). Coincidentally, it was free popcorn day. As part of some business strategy, Silverbird gives out a free pack of popcorn + one bottle of coke once every week in all Silverbird Cinemas nationwide. I can't argue with their strategy. I mean, I'm not a sucker for popcorn (free or otherwise) so I wouldn't wear dress and waka to Silverbird to watch film because of free popcorn.But loads of people will and do, apparently!
Anyways, on to my main gist. I was a few minutes late for my movie so I decided I couldn't wait in line line for the free popcorn and would get mine after the movie.
So, after the movie, I went to the popcorn stand with my free voucher and I was duly given my popcorn. Time to get my bottle of Sprite (which I was more interested in!) and the dude gave me a HOT bottle of Sprite. I could have sworn it was fresh from the oven! It was smouldering, I almost burnt my fingers!
I politely drew the "drink-giver's" attention to the fact that my drink was hot. And he told me that was the only available option. That would have been almost fine except errr, I could see a fridge FULL of cold drinks. I once again nicely pointed out the cold drinks to him. And he UNBELIEVABLY told me the cold ones were for sale!!!
Unbelievable! I was so outraged, I had acute difficulty expressing my rage.So because my drink is free, the management of Silverbird cannot be bothered to get it refrigerated? Did I beg to be given free Sprite?
Or maybe their strategy is to piss people off wit the free hot drinks so that they eventually don't have to give out too many free drinks. I decided not to give them that satisfaction and with the strongest face I could come up with, I took my hot Sprite to my house and put it in the fridge, hissing all the way like a pepper seller.
What rubbish.
Anyways, on to my main gist. I was a few minutes late for my movie so I decided I couldn't wait in line line for the free popcorn and would get mine after the movie.
So, after the movie, I went to the popcorn stand with my free voucher and I was duly given my popcorn. Time to get my bottle of Sprite (which I was more interested in!) and the dude gave me a HOT bottle of Sprite. I could have sworn it was fresh from the oven! It was smouldering, I almost burnt my fingers!
I politely drew the "drink-giver's" attention to the fact that my drink was hot. And he told me that was the only available option. That would have been almost fine except errr, I could see a fridge FULL of cold drinks. I once again nicely pointed out the cold drinks to him. And he UNBELIEVABLY told me the cold ones were for sale!!!
Unbelievable! I was so outraged, I had acute difficulty expressing my rage.So because my drink is free, the management of Silverbird cannot be bothered to get it refrigerated? Did I beg to be given free Sprite?
Or maybe their strategy is to piss people off wit the free hot drinks so that they eventually don't have to give out too many free drinks. I decided not to give them that satisfaction and with the strongest face I could come up with, I took my hot Sprite to my house and put it in the fridge, hissing all the way like a pepper seller.
What rubbish.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Are We Really Better Off?
I was in a cab the other day when the cab driver threw an empty sachet of pure water out the window. Me being a Keep-Nigeria-Clean activist couldn't resist chiding him for littering the road.
Me: Oga why you dey dirty our road na? Abi you no like as e clean so?
Cab Man: My sister, it is for the good of us all
According to him, if the streets remained cleaned, the people who are employed to sweep and keep the streets tidy would be out of jobs. He claimed that he wasn't one to litter the streets but did it every now and then just to save the jobs of his fellow Nigerians. Twisted logic but I somehow agreed with him.....if littering the streets every now and then will reduce the unemployment rate and keep more people away from criminal activities, then by all means, litter the streets!
But now sha, thinking about it....it really doesn't make all the sense in the world...I mean, we can have other alternatives of keeping our environment tidy which can also provide employment for the masses. E.g Having waste bins located on every corner. If the waste bins will be produced in Nigeria, people would be employed to work in the factories producing them, our Rubber industry would expand from increasing need for plastic...etc etc. And that's just the most basic out of a gazillion.
But 9ja sha, we like to import things. When I heard that the elections had been postponed due to late arrival of election materials into the country, what got to me first wasn't even the postponement; it was the fact that we had to import from SOUTH AFRICA. I mean, really!
Some claim that INEC wanted to be truly independent and didnt want leakages bla bla....but now, these imported materials are gonna be in Nigeria for ONE WEEK before they are used. So what was the point of "isolation" in the first instance?? *Smh*
Back in 2003, when MTN and co first came to Nigeria; there was a sudden outburst of self employed people - setting up call centres aka bizness centres. The basic requirements were 1 chair, 1 table, 1 umbrella and a phone. It used to be a booming business because of the cut-throat prices telcoms companies offered. I remember when a 1 minute call cost N50!! There was nothing like per second. If you so much as "flashed" somborri and the person picked for even one second, MTN will mercilessly take your 50 box. Wicked people.
And so for those of us who couldnt afford to buy the Booster Card (N4,000), we had to be regular customers of the bizness centre people who charged about 30 naira or so. But these days mehn, things have changed, supposedly for the better. But is it really better?
Gone are the days where we would regularly go to a Cybercafe to "buy time". Everybody now has a laptop (thanks to China, lol). Life is easier. The standard of living is supposedly better. But is it really better?
Yeah, we have much much cheaper call rates than we did in 2003. The cost of purchasing a SIM card is almost next to nothing. We have blackberries and phones we can access the internet with. Even I cant keep up with new technology that spring up every day. Just when I'm thinking of saving for the next 10yrs to get an iPhone4, I hear say iPhone 5 is on the way out, lol.
But do we every stop to consider what has happened to those people whose main source of livelihood was the profit they got from making calls. What happened to those people who were able to send their children to school from money they got from their cyber cafe businesses? What other alternatives did they turn to?
Another business? Crime? Politics? Where are they? Did things get so bad they had to relocate back to their villages?
About two years ago, okada was banned from Port Harcourt. With little or no prior notice given to the okada riders, the Rivers State govt woke up one day and said "Hey, you know what? No more Okada!"
They claimed it aided and abetted most of the criminal activities being carried out in the town. People like my father lauded the move because according to him, too many people were dying daily from okada accidents. I wasn't happy about it. No, I wasnt an okada rider. Neither did I have a boyfriend who was an okada rider, lol.
But there is something called empathy. Yes, Okada had its disadvantages. But why couldn't the Govt have provided better alternatives. Why not give these Okada riders 1 - 2 years notice. Compel them to open a savings account where they'd have had to deposit a certain amount of money weekly, monthly or quarterly. And then at the end of two years, sum up all savings and use it as a deposit for the down payment of a car which will be used as a cab. Whatever the difference is, they can make it up overtime.
That way, everybody is happy. The Okada man is happy for having a more gainful employment. The average citizen is happy for the reduced risk of falling off a bike and breakings heads and bones. The average citizen is happy for a better means of transportation.
Anyway sha, today is just one of my I-tire-for-9ja dyas. I shall stop ranting already.
Me: Oga why you dey dirty our road na? Abi you no like as e clean so?
Cab Man: My sister, it is for the good of us all
According to him, if the streets remained cleaned, the people who are employed to sweep and keep the streets tidy would be out of jobs. He claimed that he wasn't one to litter the streets but did it every now and then just to save the jobs of his fellow Nigerians. Twisted logic but I somehow agreed with him.....if littering the streets every now and then will reduce the unemployment rate and keep more people away from criminal activities, then by all means, litter the streets!
But now sha, thinking about it....it really doesn't make all the sense in the world...I mean, we can have other alternatives of keeping our environment tidy which can also provide employment for the masses. E.g Having waste bins located on every corner. If the waste bins will be produced in Nigeria, people would be employed to work in the factories producing them, our Rubber industry would expand from increasing need for plastic...etc etc. And that's just the most basic out of a gazillion.
But 9ja sha, we like to import things. When I heard that the elections had been postponed due to late arrival of election materials into the country, what got to me first wasn't even the postponement; it was the fact that we had to import from SOUTH AFRICA. I mean, really!
Some claim that INEC wanted to be truly independent and didnt want leakages bla bla....but now, these imported materials are gonna be in Nigeria for ONE WEEK before they are used. So what was the point of "isolation" in the first instance?? *Smh*
Back in 2003, when MTN and co first came to Nigeria; there was a sudden outburst of self employed people - setting up call centres aka bizness centres. The basic requirements were 1 chair, 1 table, 1 umbrella and a phone. It used to be a booming business because of the cut-throat prices telcoms companies offered. I remember when a 1 minute call cost N50!! There was nothing like per second. If you so much as "flashed" somborri and the person picked for even one second, MTN will mercilessly take your 50 box. Wicked people.
And so for those of us who couldnt afford to buy the Booster Card (N4,000), we had to be regular customers of the bizness centre people who charged about 30 naira or so. But these days mehn, things have changed, supposedly for the better. But is it really better?
Gone are the days where we would regularly go to a Cybercafe to "buy time". Everybody now has a laptop (thanks to China, lol). Life is easier. The standard of living is supposedly better. But is it really better?
Yeah, we have much much cheaper call rates than we did in 2003. The cost of purchasing a SIM card is almost next to nothing. We have blackberries and phones we can access the internet with. Even I cant keep up with new technology that spring up every day. Just when I'm thinking of saving for the next 10yrs to get an iPhone4, I hear say iPhone 5 is on the way out, lol.
But do we every stop to consider what has happened to those people whose main source of livelihood was the profit they got from making calls. What happened to those people who were able to send their children to school from money they got from their cyber cafe businesses? What other alternatives did they turn to?
Another business? Crime? Politics? Where are they? Did things get so bad they had to relocate back to their villages?
About two years ago, okada was banned from Port Harcourt. With little or no prior notice given to the okada riders, the Rivers State govt woke up one day and said "Hey, you know what? No more Okada!"
They claimed it aided and abetted most of the criminal activities being carried out in the town. People like my father lauded the move because according to him, too many people were dying daily from okada accidents. I wasn't happy about it. No, I wasnt an okada rider. Neither did I have a boyfriend who was an okada rider, lol.
But there is something called empathy. Yes, Okada had its disadvantages. But why couldn't the Govt have provided better alternatives. Why not give these Okada riders 1 - 2 years notice. Compel them to open a savings account where they'd have had to deposit a certain amount of money weekly, monthly or quarterly. And then at the end of two years, sum up all savings and use it as a deposit for the down payment of a car which will be used as a cab. Whatever the difference is, they can make it up overtime.
That way, everybody is happy. The Okada man is happy for having a more gainful employment. The average citizen is happy for the reduced risk of falling off a bike and breakings heads and bones. The average citizen is happy for a better means of transportation.
Anyway sha, today is just one of my I-tire-for-9ja dyas. I shall stop ranting already.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Writing Aloud...
Mehn, today I heard a disturbing/funny/sad/partially surprising news. My cousin had a baby yesterday! Now, I haven’t seen her in a while so I didn’t even know she’d been preggers. Having a baby is a normal thing, you’d say except that my cousin is unmarried and atleast four years younger than I am. And I’m 23. (or 24 if I add this year). That makes her 19 (or 20 if I add this year). My younger sis who is also older than my cousin called to give me the gist and she said we were dulling in our (immediate) family. That is, nothing this dramatic ever happens in my house. We’re just boring people, I guess! Anyways, this technically makes my aunty a grandma! Coincidentally, my aunty also had her first baby at 16, 17 or some funny age. So I wonder, will she have any right(s) to be mad at her 20 year old who waited a little longer than she did? Hmm!
I spoke with my mum and she also just found out. Apparently, my aunty (her younger sis) hid the news from her. And I’m wondering what’s going on in my mum’s head seeing as her “grand-maternal hormones” have been raging these days and she’s been singing marriage in my ear. The name of the song is “It Is Better To Marry Early”. 9ja Top 10. See me see wahala. Anyway, I hope she isn’t jealous of my aunt’s new grandmother status…lol. I joked that if I’d towed the line of my cousin, my kid will probably be in Primary 1 by now. My mother didn’t laugh. Lol.
My cousin life don get K-leg. Just like that. And that’s how the cookie crumbled. She refused to go to school, and blamed it on her inability to comprehend whatever was being taught. Whoever got her preggers obviously isn’t in any position to marry her. I’m sad for her. Sadder for the baby. Innocent baby.
And then, it got me back to thinking about “Unanswerable Questions”. Like some girl in my former office. Serious born again chic who married as a virgin. She attends Deeper Life. As in, no earrings, no make-up, no hair extensions type. She’s so cool, she’s the coolest deeper lifer I ever met. She doesn’t have any of that stuck-up attitude people like her usually have towards us “sinners” who fix our hair, wear trousers and rub lipstick. Anyway, she’s been married for a number of years but is still believing God for the fruit of the womb. In that same office, there’s an unmarried woman who has a kid and is presently heavily pregnant again. And I wonder what’s going through the cool deeper lifer’s head. Questions?
Questions that every now and then go through everybody’s(or at least mine!) minds. Situations that defy logic. Like now, here’s my lil cousin, she’s been blessed with the blessing of a child, without deserving it, without even wanting it. And yet, there are a million people who deserve it, who yearn for it, and more importantly, walk upright with God and yet, nothing….
I’m not asking….I’m just thinking writing aloud…..
Friday, February 11, 2011
42 Days of God's Faithfulness..
It's just been 42 days into 2011 and yet I feel God has done so much for me it's simply amazing. It may not seem like much to someone else, but to me, it's mega. And I realised, I dont have to wait till its 365 days to realise his awesomeness. I should acknowledge it every single day He gives me oxygen to breathe.
I want to thank God for preserving my life and for protection. I thank Him for overseeing my going out and coming in for the past 42 days. It may not seem like much abi? I've passed quite a number of accident scenes this year that happened on roads I pass through every day. Once I saw a car cut in half...
I thank God for journey mercies in all the plenty waka waka I have had to do this year (and will still do today). People have gotten into planes and never got out alive. People have gotten into cars and never got out alive. For journey mercies, I thank Him from the bottom of my heart.
A few weeks into the year, God averted was could have been a major fire disaster. I had just cooked indomie and decided to boil eggs. Because I know a watched pot never boils, I decided to go to my room and chill pending when the eggs boil. I was already out the kitchen door when I heard "boom!". And the next thing I saw was fire going up the ceiling. The pipe connecting the cooker to the gas cylinder had gone off...
I thank God the gas didnt explode. I thank God I was still around there when it pulled off...because if Id been in the room already, it would have been too late....I thank God we were able to pu out the fire on time..I thank God...
A few weeks into the year, robbers came visiting. I thank God that they stole material things and not human life. I thank God that I wasnt one of the robbers. I thank God we didnt have to take anyone to the hospital. I thank God we didnt have to cry over the loss of any life. I thank God...
I thank God for closure I have gotten from my past relationship. I thank God for removing the scales from my eyes before it was too late. I thank Him for the amazing strength He has given me.....
He has done so much for me, I cannot help but be blown away.
I have to go now, unfortunately. I go dey thank God dey go sha!
Thank God oh!!!
I want to thank God for preserving my life and for protection. I thank Him for overseeing my going out and coming in for the past 42 days. It may not seem like much abi? I've passed quite a number of accident scenes this year that happened on roads I pass through every day. Once I saw a car cut in half...
I thank God for journey mercies in all the plenty waka waka I have had to do this year (and will still do today). People have gotten into planes and never got out alive. People have gotten into cars and never got out alive. For journey mercies, I thank Him from the bottom of my heart.
A few weeks into the year, God averted was could have been a major fire disaster. I had just cooked indomie and decided to boil eggs. Because I know a watched pot never boils, I decided to go to my room and chill pending when the eggs boil. I was already out the kitchen door when I heard "boom!". And the next thing I saw was fire going up the ceiling. The pipe connecting the cooker to the gas cylinder had gone off...
I thank God the gas didnt explode. I thank God I was still around there when it pulled off...because if Id been in the room already, it would have been too late....I thank God we were able to pu out the fire on time..I thank God...
A few weeks into the year, robbers came visiting. I thank God that they stole material things and not human life. I thank God that I wasnt one of the robbers. I thank God we didnt have to take anyone to the hospital. I thank God we didnt have to cry over the loss of any life. I thank God...
I thank God for closure I have gotten from my past relationship. I thank God for removing the scales from my eyes before it was too late. I thank Him for the amazing strength He has given me.....
He has done so much for me, I cannot help but be blown away.
I have to go now, unfortunately. I go dey thank God dey go sha!
Thank God oh!!!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
My Ex Boyfriend's Wedding
My ex-boyfriend got married today.
I had gotten a call from an amebo a week back telling me about it. I was in the middle of some financial calculations before the call came in, and immediately she told me, my brain froze for the next 20 seconds. After the call, I just sat there enjoying my brain freeze. lol.
And then, I went back to my calculations like nothing had happened. But for the rest of the day, I walked around with a huge headache. And then I got another call from some1 saying : "Congrats oh! I heard you guys FINALLY fixed a date". Silence. Click. Call ended. I dont know what got to me more - the fact that he was getting married or the person he was getting married to. I think it was the latter. I couldnt figure out why he'd decide to marry her.
I kept going over it and I just couldn't arrive at a logical conclusion. Then I called him. Prior to now, we hadn't really been on speaking terms for the past 3 months (apart from the Happy new year call). He didn't pick up. I sent him a text telling him to get back to me cos I needed to ask him something. He got back to me after a few hours but I decided I really didnt wanna know so I didnt take his calls. He kept calling repeatedly and I finally took his call the next day. I told him I'd wanted to get some info from his office (nose growing) but I'd already gotten it from somewhere else. We went on to gist like nothing ever happened - him telling me about his work pressures etc etc. It was a week to the wedding. He didnt tell me about it and I didnt indicate I knew.
Then about 3 days ago, he called. Told me it took him all the bravery in the world to initiate the call. Went into a long speech about me being the one person in the world he owes everything - explanation, respect, regard bla bla and then went on to say "I'm getting married". Oh well, I'd known for a week now so there was no jolt. After he told me who he was getting married to, I proceeded to ask the question Id been dying to ask - "Why her??"
And he goes "I dont know. I'm still in shock. I'm surprised. I'm confused"
And I go "ooooookaaaaaayyyyy and you are telling me this because??"
Him: "You are my best friend. You are the only one in the world who always has my back. I see you as my guardian angel. You are one person in the world who always tells me the truth no matter what. I still had your name as my password up until today. Bla bla bla"
And I'm rolling my eyes thinking: Now what?! There's a never-ending supply of drama with this guy.
Me: Is she pregnant?
Him: That's the first question everybody asks. No she isn't
Me: Abi she don jazz you...?
Him: Silence. All I feel is surprise. Maybe when I say "I do" it'll finally sink in
Me: Maybe
Him: Where are you? I need to see you
Me: I'm not in town (thank God). I moved to Abuja (because I had to run away from the madness we called our love, our seamless love)
Him: I really need to see you
Me: So that we'll start kissing abi? And then what? You'll call off your wedding? You know how me and you are - like two naked wires.
Him: Can you please attend the wedding?
Me: Are you for real?? (was tempted to say stupid). Sorry, I can't.
Him: Please just do it for me, it'll help me start the healing process (Imagine the nerve sha, chei, I don suffer)
Me: Sorry I cant. (Trying with all my might not to launch into a fierce verbal attack)
Him: It's funny, I'm getting married but I still love you. I'll always love you
Me: Do you love her?
Him: Kinda
Me: Yes or No
Him: Kinda. But I know I'll never love anyone half as much as I love you
(Very plenty talk talk, cant even type half of it)
Nna na wa o! Before my lonnnnng conversation with him, I was feeling pretty okay about the whole wedding thing. But after that, I couldnt stop thinking about it and just feeling sorry for him. What I feel is just pity, actually. Kai. How does life turn out so funny that the gr8est love of my life goes and marries sm1 else. I havent even been able to really like any1, not to talk of date. And he's getting married. Na wa sha. I guess I was just drinking panadol for another man's headache. A man I was willing to do anything and go anywhere for. Anyway..."was" being the operative word.
Anyway, I had the date emboldened in my head - 29th January. But surprisingly, I slept well last night, infact too well sef. I woke up feeling okay and I even forgot about it till later. Thought about it a bit and wondered if he'd said "I do". Half expected sm1 to call and say he didnt show up for the wedding or said "I cant" instead of "I do". I'm not paranoid, but it really is something he can do. He's weird like that. Igot about three "I-cant-believe-he-married-her-calls" and my response was "Well, he did".Today ended up being a pretty normal Saturday for me. I had a noice, long nap. Cleaned the kitchen with all my heart and soul. Finished Season 6 of Grey's Anatomy. Swore that if Derek died, I'd stop watching. And I meant it.
And now, I'm sitting here blogging. And I'm happy...Strange. In a calm way, I'm happy. And I have peace....
I had gotten a call from an amebo a week back telling me about it. I was in the middle of some financial calculations before the call came in, and immediately she told me, my brain froze for the next 20 seconds. After the call, I just sat there enjoying my brain freeze. lol.
And then, I went back to my calculations like nothing had happened. But for the rest of the day, I walked around with a huge headache. And then I got another call from some1 saying : "Congrats oh! I heard you guys FINALLY fixed a date". Silence. Click. Call ended. I dont know what got to me more - the fact that he was getting married or the person he was getting married to. I think it was the latter. I couldnt figure out why he'd decide to marry her.
I kept going over it and I just couldn't arrive at a logical conclusion. Then I called him. Prior to now, we hadn't really been on speaking terms for the past 3 months (apart from the Happy new year call). He didn't pick up. I sent him a text telling him to get back to me cos I needed to ask him something. He got back to me after a few hours but I decided I really didnt wanna know so I didnt take his calls. He kept calling repeatedly and I finally took his call the next day. I told him I'd wanted to get some info from his office (nose growing) but I'd already gotten it from somewhere else. We went on to gist like nothing ever happened - him telling me about his work pressures etc etc. It was a week to the wedding. He didnt tell me about it and I didnt indicate I knew.
Then about 3 days ago, he called. Told me it took him all the bravery in the world to initiate the call. Went into a long speech about me being the one person in the world he owes everything - explanation, respect, regard bla bla and then went on to say "I'm getting married". Oh well, I'd known for a week now so there was no jolt. After he told me who he was getting married to, I proceeded to ask the question Id been dying to ask - "Why her??"
And he goes "I dont know. I'm still in shock. I'm surprised. I'm confused"
And I go "ooooookaaaaaayyyyy and you are telling me this because??"
Him: "You are my best friend. You are the only one in the world who always has my back. I see you as my guardian angel. You are one person in the world who always tells me the truth no matter what. I still had your name as my password up until today. Bla bla bla"
And I'm rolling my eyes thinking: Now what?! There's a never-ending supply of drama with this guy.
Me: Is she pregnant?
Him: That's the first question everybody asks. No she isn't
Me: Abi she don jazz you...?
Him: Silence. All I feel is surprise. Maybe when I say "I do" it'll finally sink in
Me: Maybe
Him: Where are you? I need to see you
Me: I'm not in town (thank God). I moved to Abuja (because I had to run away from the madness we called our love, our seamless love)
Him: I really need to see you
Me: So that we'll start kissing abi? And then what? You'll call off your wedding? You know how me and you are - like two naked wires.
Him: Can you please attend the wedding?
Me: Are you for real?? (was tempted to say stupid). Sorry, I can't.
Him: Please just do it for me, it'll help me start the healing process (Imagine the nerve sha, chei, I don suffer)
Me: Sorry I cant. (Trying with all my might not to launch into a fierce verbal attack)
Him: It's funny, I'm getting married but I still love you. I'll always love you
Me: Do you love her?
Him: Kinda
Me: Yes or No
Him: Kinda. But I know I'll never love anyone half as much as I love you
(Very plenty talk talk, cant even type half of it)
Nna na wa o! Before my lonnnnng conversation with him, I was feeling pretty okay about the whole wedding thing. But after that, I couldnt stop thinking about it and just feeling sorry for him. What I feel is just pity, actually. Kai. How does life turn out so funny that the gr8est love of my life goes and marries sm1 else. I havent even been able to really like any1, not to talk of date. And he's getting married. Na wa sha. I guess I was just drinking panadol for another man's headache. A man I was willing to do anything and go anywhere for. Anyway..."was" being the operative word.
Anyway, I had the date emboldened in my head - 29th January. But surprisingly, I slept well last night, infact too well sef. I woke up feeling okay and I even forgot about it till later. Thought about it a bit and wondered if he'd said "I do". Half expected sm1 to call and say he didnt show up for the wedding or said "I cant" instead of "I do". I'm not paranoid, but it really is something he can do. He's weird like that. Igot about three "I-cant-believe-he-married-her-calls" and my response was "Well, he did".Today ended up being a pretty normal Saturday for me. I had a noice, long nap. Cleaned the kitchen with all my heart and soul. Finished Season 6 of Grey's Anatomy. Swore that if Derek died, I'd stop watching. And I meant it.
And now, I'm sitting here blogging. And I'm happy...Strange. In a calm way, I'm happy. And I have peace....
Friday, January 28, 2011
Everything Happens For A Reason....
Little notes from Rick Warren's "The Purpose-Driven Life":
"In order to keep us frrom being too attached to earth, God allows us to feel a significant amount of discontent and dissatisfaction with life - longings that will never be fulfilled on this side of eternity."
"When you fully comprehend that there is more to life than just here and now, you realise that life is just a preparation for eternity, you will begin to live differently. You will start living in the light of eternity, and that will colour how you handle every relationship, task, situation etc. Suddenly, many activities, goals, and even problems that seemed so important will appear trivial and unworthy of your attention. The closer you live to God, the smaller everything else appears.."
There are certain things in life we constantly pray not to experience. Topmost on that list is pain. Nobody wants to have pain in their life. But try as we may, pray as we may, it is inevitable. It shows up at some point or the other, when we least expect it. Pain comes in different shades. We cry when we feel pain, we pray for it to go away. Pain isn't a pleasant thing.
But I don't think so. I think pain is a gift. I'm almost tempted to call it a good thing even. When we are sick, the first pointer is the pain we feel. This pain propels us to go for a test and/or take medication. Imagine what will happen if you lose the ability to feel pain. It just means you never know when you are healthy and when you arent. And if you cant feel pain, you wont know when to take steps to help you get better.
Yesterday, I watched a story of some man on Reality TV. He went to war in Vietnam and lost both legs in the process. That's an incredibly terrible thing - losing one's legs. He went through a "God-why-me" phase. He was a big believer in "ëverything happens for a reason" and so he desperately sought to find out what reason God could possibly have to take away his legs. He just couldn't rationalize it, there were no logical answers.
God's ways are not our ways. Sometimes, we try to stereotype God, trying to make Him fit into our own line of reasoning. Huge mistake. His ways aren't our ways. God has a reason for everything that happens. Sometimes, He lets us see it right away. Sometimes, He lets us wait a while and shows it to us long after we have forgotten. And other times, we don't even get to find out at all. He knows EVERYTHING.
Jeremiah 1:5 - "Ï knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb. Before you were born, I set you apart as my prophet to the nations"
Before we were even formed, He knew us. He knew the egg and the sperm that would bring us forth. Isn't that just mind-blowing? If He knows that, what makes us think He doesn't have a reason for allowing certain things happen to us. He knows.
The 2nd part says He has set us apart as prophets to the nations. Some people will say, "Well, that one is not my calling". Wrong. We are all purposed to be God's prophets. You dont have to own a church and shout with a microphone or megaphone to be qualified as a prophet. We all have a responsibility to let the world know about Jesus. Others can see Jesus through us if we let it. I don dey digress....
Back to my story...
The man without the legs sought to find out why God allowed him go through all that pain. Some time had passed, and he had probably even given up hope in getting answers from God. He was going through a newspaper when he saw a story of two Russian twins who had been abandoned after birth by their mother because they were born without legs. And he knew immediately. He knew that was the reason he lost his legs - so he could give life to those children.
He proceeded to adopt them as his children, got them prosthetic legs, and just generally provided them with a life they never would have had if he had left them in Russia. As at the time of the documentary, the kids were already about 9yrs old. I watched them ride a bike, swim, and do every other thing normal children could do and I just had tears in my eyes. They see Jesus through the eyes of the man who saved their life. Through the love and warmth gotten from their adopted family, they experience God's love.
If this man hadn't lost his legs in the war, chances of him even noticing the story of the legless children would have been next to none.
I have a friend who lost his mum a few years ago. He shocked me when he told me that God had a reason for letting his mum go. He was deeply affected and pained by the loss, of course. But after a while, he figured it was best for her to have gone at the time she had. She was a wonderful woman who was blameless and upright. But at some point, due to life's pressures, she was almost beginning to succumb to alternatives that God wouldn't have been pleased with. And it was at that point that God took her, just before she could have deviated....His level of acceptance was deep...and it shook me, albeit quietly.
God has a higher purpose for everything he permits to happen to us. We may never know that purpose directly. But just knowing that He never lets us handle more than we can bear is enough to comfort us. He knows everything. He sees everything. For each tear that He permits to fall from our eyes, there is a purpose...
Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good, and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope..."
And now, to my all time favourite scripture:
Romans 8: 28 - Äll things worketh together for the good of they that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose".
Nothing beats that!! Absolutely nothing....
"In order to keep us frrom being too attached to earth, God allows us to feel a significant amount of discontent and dissatisfaction with life - longings that will never be fulfilled on this side of eternity."
"When you fully comprehend that there is more to life than just here and now, you realise that life is just a preparation for eternity, you will begin to live differently. You will start living in the light of eternity, and that will colour how you handle every relationship, task, situation etc. Suddenly, many activities, goals, and even problems that seemed so important will appear trivial and unworthy of your attention. The closer you live to God, the smaller everything else appears.."
There are certain things in life we constantly pray not to experience. Topmost on that list is pain. Nobody wants to have pain in their life. But try as we may, pray as we may, it is inevitable. It shows up at some point or the other, when we least expect it. Pain comes in different shades. We cry when we feel pain, we pray for it to go away. Pain isn't a pleasant thing.
But I don't think so. I think pain is a gift. I'm almost tempted to call it a good thing even. When we are sick, the first pointer is the pain we feel. This pain propels us to go for a test and/or take medication. Imagine what will happen if you lose the ability to feel pain. It just means you never know when you are healthy and when you arent. And if you cant feel pain, you wont know when to take steps to help you get better.
Yesterday, I watched a story of some man on Reality TV. He went to war in Vietnam and lost both legs in the process. That's an incredibly terrible thing - losing one's legs. He went through a "God-why-me" phase. He was a big believer in "ëverything happens for a reason" and so he desperately sought to find out what reason God could possibly have to take away his legs. He just couldn't rationalize it, there were no logical answers.
God's ways are not our ways. Sometimes, we try to stereotype God, trying to make Him fit into our own line of reasoning. Huge mistake. His ways aren't our ways. God has a reason for everything that happens. Sometimes, He lets us see it right away. Sometimes, He lets us wait a while and shows it to us long after we have forgotten. And other times, we don't even get to find out at all. He knows EVERYTHING.
Jeremiah 1:5 - "Ï knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb. Before you were born, I set you apart as my prophet to the nations"
Before we were even formed, He knew us. He knew the egg and the sperm that would bring us forth. Isn't that just mind-blowing? If He knows that, what makes us think He doesn't have a reason for allowing certain things happen to us. He knows.
The 2nd part says He has set us apart as prophets to the nations. Some people will say, "Well, that one is not my calling". Wrong. We are all purposed to be God's prophets. You dont have to own a church and shout with a microphone or megaphone to be qualified as a prophet. We all have a responsibility to let the world know about Jesus. Others can see Jesus through us if we let it. I don dey digress....
Back to my story...
The man without the legs sought to find out why God allowed him go through all that pain. Some time had passed, and he had probably even given up hope in getting answers from God. He was going through a newspaper when he saw a story of two Russian twins who had been abandoned after birth by their mother because they were born without legs. And he knew immediately. He knew that was the reason he lost his legs - so he could give life to those children.
He proceeded to adopt them as his children, got them prosthetic legs, and just generally provided them with a life they never would have had if he had left them in Russia. As at the time of the documentary, the kids were already about 9yrs old. I watched them ride a bike, swim, and do every other thing normal children could do and I just had tears in my eyes. They see Jesus through the eyes of the man who saved their life. Through the love and warmth gotten from their adopted family, they experience God's love.
If this man hadn't lost his legs in the war, chances of him even noticing the story of the legless children would have been next to none.
I have a friend who lost his mum a few years ago. He shocked me when he told me that God had a reason for letting his mum go. He was deeply affected and pained by the loss, of course. But after a while, he figured it was best for her to have gone at the time she had. She was a wonderful woman who was blameless and upright. But at some point, due to life's pressures, she was almost beginning to succumb to alternatives that God wouldn't have been pleased with. And it was at that point that God took her, just before she could have deviated....His level of acceptance was deep...and it shook me, albeit quietly.
God has a higher purpose for everything he permits to happen to us. We may never know that purpose directly. But just knowing that He never lets us handle more than we can bear is enough to comfort us. He knows everything. He sees everything. For each tear that He permits to fall from our eyes, there is a purpose...
Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good, and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope..."
And now, to my all time favourite scripture:
Romans 8: 28 - Äll things worketh together for the good of they that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose".
Nothing beats that!! Absolutely nothing....
Friday, January 21, 2011
Thanking God..
Why do some people just feel like they are the only ones with problems in this life sef..?
Yesterday, I was feeling a little down and out (as is becoming alarmingly regular these days!) and I think I fell asleep chatting on yahoo messenger or reading a book or both. Dont quite remember.
The next time I was awake, it was to the sound of a loud thud and somebody shouting "Yeeeee!". I did not need to think and wonder what might be going on or where the sound might be coming from, or whatever else. I jumped and ran into my friend's room. The house was in pitch darkness.
And I said "something is going on" because at this point, I wasnt entirely sure what it was. Next thing I knew, I was on the floor head down by the side of the bed. Two extra people fell on me. My neck was in the most awkward position and I was pretty certain it was gonna break.
I was torn between destroying my neck and having the armed robbers deal with me for making noise. I chose the former.
Just a little over a month after we were attacked, these criminals struck again last night. Obviously better prepared this time. For some odd reason, I wasn't as scared as I'd have expected myself to be. In my mind, they were in already. It couldn't get much worse than this. Except they decide to shoot someone.
After what seemed like an eternity of threatening to shoot if we look, threatening to shoot if we dont bring the money, threatening to shoot for putting all the money in the bank and all the other threats, they finally left.
And then my shaking began. And cold. And fever. And excessive pissing.
And oh by the way, the Nigerian Police is absolutely useless. Let's not even go there.
After a couple of hours, I gathered courage to enter my room. My phones were gone, expectedly. My laptop was gone, expectedly. My babies. Those were my babies. They were there for me when no1 else ever was. Sadly, my laptop wasn't backed up. Lesson One: Procrastination leads you nowhere. If you wanna do something, do it NOW. Backing up my laptop has been on my to-do list in forever.
Anyways, here I was thinking about the loss of all my personal documents, office documents and all my phone numbers, my one billion songs, one million pictures etc etc. Thank God I'm alive. Thank God we all are still alive. Thank God we didn't have to rush anybody to the hospital.
I have heard of cases of robberies that didn't last 3 minutes yet people didn't survive it. I have heard of a robbery where a pregnant woman was shot in her tummy for no apparent reason. I have heard of a robbery where a man was hit so hard with a gun that his eyeball fell out. Thank God we're alive. There's no logical explanation except for God's mercies. Thank God for making us invisible to them. Thank God for being our shield when we needed Him most.
If I was an oyibo woman, I for don dey do therapy by now. But for 9ja, we don't do shrinks. People never chop 3-square meals finish na shrink we go dey pursue?
As it got dark today, I began to feel uneasy. I need therapy. But the only therapy I have access to is Baba God. He alone will soothe my fears away. He alone can calm the raging storms. He alone giveth peace that defies all understanding.
Like the song they sang in church on tuesday:
You are God
All by Yourself
You alone
And no1 else
You are God all by Yourself
You are holy...
It's comforting to know that God doesn't require any1's help to be God. He is God all by Himself. It's comforting to know that he doesn't need to make any consultations before He shows Himself strong in our lives. He doesn't need any1's approval. Isn't that just awesome! All I have to do is remember this, and everything is ok....
Every new day from God is a blessing. It is a privilege. Don't ever take that for granted...
Yesterday, I was feeling a little down and out (as is becoming alarmingly regular these days!) and I think I fell asleep chatting on yahoo messenger or reading a book or both. Dont quite remember.
The next time I was awake, it was to the sound of a loud thud and somebody shouting "Yeeeee!". I did not need to think and wonder what might be going on or where the sound might be coming from, or whatever else. I jumped and ran into my friend's room. The house was in pitch darkness.
And I said "something is going on" because at this point, I wasnt entirely sure what it was. Next thing I knew, I was on the floor head down by the side of the bed. Two extra people fell on me. My neck was in the most awkward position and I was pretty certain it was gonna break.
I was torn between destroying my neck and having the armed robbers deal with me for making noise. I chose the former.
Just a little over a month after we were attacked, these criminals struck again last night. Obviously better prepared this time. For some odd reason, I wasn't as scared as I'd have expected myself to be. In my mind, they were in already. It couldn't get much worse than this. Except they decide to shoot someone.
After what seemed like an eternity of threatening to shoot if we look, threatening to shoot if we dont bring the money, threatening to shoot for putting all the money in the bank and all the other threats, they finally left.
And then my shaking began. And cold. And fever. And excessive pissing.
And oh by the way, the Nigerian Police is absolutely useless. Let's not even go there.
After a couple of hours, I gathered courage to enter my room. My phones were gone, expectedly. My laptop was gone, expectedly. My babies. Those were my babies. They were there for me when no1 else ever was. Sadly, my laptop wasn't backed up. Lesson One: Procrastination leads you nowhere. If you wanna do something, do it NOW. Backing up my laptop has been on my to-do list in forever.
Anyways, here I was thinking about the loss of all my personal documents, office documents and all my phone numbers, my one billion songs, one million pictures etc etc. Thank God I'm alive. Thank God we all are still alive. Thank God we didn't have to rush anybody to the hospital.
I have heard of cases of robberies that didn't last 3 minutes yet people didn't survive it. I have heard of a robbery where a pregnant woman was shot in her tummy for no apparent reason. I have heard of a robbery where a man was hit so hard with a gun that his eyeball fell out. Thank God we're alive. There's no logical explanation except for God's mercies. Thank God for making us invisible to them. Thank God for being our shield when we needed Him most.
If I was an oyibo woman, I for don dey do therapy by now. But for 9ja, we don't do shrinks. People never chop 3-square meals finish na shrink we go dey pursue?
As it got dark today, I began to feel uneasy. I need therapy. But the only therapy I have access to is Baba God. He alone will soothe my fears away. He alone can calm the raging storms. He alone giveth peace that defies all understanding.
Like the song they sang in church on tuesday:
You are God
All by Yourself
You alone
And no1 else
You are God all by Yourself
You are holy...
It's comforting to know that God doesn't require any1's help to be God. He is God all by Himself. It's comforting to know that he doesn't need to make any consultations before He shows Himself strong in our lives. He doesn't need any1's approval. Isn't that just awesome! All I have to do is remember this, and everything is ok....
Every new day from God is a blessing. It is a privilege. Don't ever take that for granted...
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Things Change..
Was feeling a bit emotionally weak a couple of days ago. It came in little bits and pieces. I'm a happy person. And even though I can't altogether escape sadness forever, it's inevitable every now and then but I don't know how to remain sad for long.
But these bit and pieces sometimes get hard. And painful. And seemingly long.
Yesterday, my friend wrote something for me. I read it and I smiled. The kinda smile that comes from the heart and reaches the eyes. I needed to hear/read those words. I had a serious "Awww Moment". I read it and re-read it and it offered some level of comfort.
I thought I'd share, just incase there's any1 going thru any difficult situation(s). And I'm also "re-sharing" it for the person who wrote it.
This is from me back to you....
Things Change
Tears may come now, but you will smile again,
Pain will go away, wounds will heal again,
Scars may remain, but they can shape and mold you,
So don't try to hide who you are,
But then know who you will be.
The world is round true, but it turns, constantly,
Down you may be today, stars you will face tomorrow.
Seasons come and go but things never remain the same,
A season may bring pain this year, but then;
The same season, could bring joy on the next.
Treasure the times, treasure the moments,
They fly by, past and gone forever.
When it seems you can't hold it in,
Let it out slowly, don't hold it in,
Let it go surely and then move on.
Life is a journey, a life-long one,
Whether it be comfortable or uncomfortable,
Know this, it can get easier if u move on,
So, smile through the tears,
Laugh through the pain,
Find the little slices of joy,
So you can be as right as rain.
Hold the joy in and find warmth,
Laugh through the pain and know peace,
Know and remember all through this;
Things never ever stay the same.
But these bit and pieces sometimes get hard. And painful. And seemingly long.
Yesterday, my friend wrote something for me. I read it and I smiled. The kinda smile that comes from the heart and reaches the eyes. I needed to hear/read those words. I had a serious "Awww Moment". I read it and re-read it and it offered some level of comfort.
I thought I'd share, just incase there's any1 going thru any difficult situation(s). And I'm also "re-sharing" it for the person who wrote it.
This is from me back to you....
Things Change
Tears may come now, but you will smile again,
Pain will go away, wounds will heal again,
Scars may remain, but they can shape and mold you,
So don't try to hide who you are,
But then know who you will be.
The world is round true, but it turns, constantly,
Down you may be today, stars you will face tomorrow.
Seasons come and go but things never remain the same,
A season may bring pain this year, but then;
The same season, could bring joy on the next.
Treasure the times, treasure the moments,
They fly by, past and gone forever.
When it seems you can't hold it in,
Let it out slowly, don't hold it in,
Let it go surely and then move on.
Life is a journey, a life-long one,
Whether it be comfortable or uncomfortable,
Know this, it can get easier if u move on,
So, smile through the tears,
Laugh through the pain,
Find the little slices of joy,
So you can be as right as rain.
Hold the joy in and find warmth,
Laugh through the pain and know peace,
Know and remember all through this;
Things never ever stay the same.
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