Motherhood

Hello World.

It's 2014 and I did not even post one single hello all through 2013.

I'd like to blame it on motherhood. But should I?

Nna mehn. First of all, hats off to my mother who had five children and my grandmother who had 10 children!!! A super huge twale to them!

With only one child, I feel as though I am CONSTANTLY tired. Even when I'm asleep, I'm tired. LOL!

I had my first child 10 months and 16 days ago at 10.20pm on a Monday night. I remember thinking "this one wey I born on Monday night, it means my daughter will be a career, office-type woman". Buhahaha. I remember questioning my sanity shortly after that thought.

I had a pretty uneventful pregnancy and labour was equally uneventful, generally speaking.

However oh, to me sha, labour and delivery were dang painful! Shet!!!

While I was having contractions and all, my dad kept calling me to tell me not to be worried and how labour is soooo easy. Buhahaha. *Straight face*.

Dad: Don't worry, you'll be fine, You know, all the times you mummy gave birth, she just went in and out like she went to urinate.

Not even to shit. Urinate. Really, dad? You'd think he was the one that pushed all five of us out.

To be fair to him though, I do understand where his calmness was coming from. Being the first child, I'd like to think I saw my mother all through four pregnancies. And I can say for sure, I remember and was conscious for only three.

My mum did make it look so easy. Her third child was even born at home, right on the floor of the sitting room because before they could find a cab to take her to the hospital, she had already pushed the baby out. And I watched from the window. Almost 21 years after that, the picture (abi na video :D) is still firmly imprinted in my head.

I woke up that morning with some new type of pain and I knew it was going to happen that day. I woke my husband up, he bathed me and got me prepared..lol
Made sure I ate well well so I'll have enough power to push. but then I remembered that some women poop in the process of pushing but I was afraid to empty my bowels so I don't push my princess into the toilet.

Headed to the hospital with my hospital ngwongwo feeling like voltron ready to push. The matrons looked at me up and down and laughed. They said I definitely wasn't in labour because if I was, I won't be as cheerful and bubbly. Whaat?

Just to indulge me though, a doctor proceeded to check how far dilated I was and it was just a mere 3cm compared to the 10cm I needed to push. By the way, the method of measuring dilation is just way tooo crude. Infact, I think it was the worst part of my ordeal sef. They stick their whole fist (maybe I'm exaggerating, some fingers sha) far up into vagina. Wth? I didn't find it funny at all at all. Mschew

I was given the option of going back home or pacing around the hospital. I went back home, came back after a few hrs, they did the annoying dilation check again and it was just 4cm, I think. Dang!

I left again and went to Shoprite with my husband to by a vacuum cleaner because we figured our incoming princess didn't need a single dust in her princessy life. Infact we were both just crazy that day.
After shop rite, we stopped at the spare parts village to buy something for his car. We were generally just acting normal between bouts of increasing contractions though.

I went home and had another bath and headed to the hospital. Annoying dilation check again, arrgh. 6cm this time. I was told to take of my clothes, lay down on the bed and chill. It was all well and good till they hooked me up to a drip (oxytocin). And that was when the pain started. I thought i was gonna gooo crrraaazyyyyyy. Jesus. The pain was so much that I even fell asleep in between. I know that doesn't make any sense but hey!

But when the baba of all pain came, I knew it was time. I went wild. I saw myself yanking the drip and pushing the stand down. I remember even trying to bite somebody. Lol. And then I was told to push without stopping. I think I tried once and failed. And the matron said to me "Your baby's head is already almost out, If you don't push, she will die"

Ahhhhhhh. See push. I pushed till I was sure my intestines and entire digestive system will come out along with the baby. And there she was. My yellow baby.

I had been anticipating this moment for the past 8 months and I had thought I'd die from too much love and happiness. But truth is, I felt nothing. Just exhaustion. I was bloody tired.

But in the hours, days, weeks, months that have followed, the pure love, joy, happiness, contentment I feel just from this one little tiny girl CANNOT be put down in words.

She wears me out because she is just one of those baza queen babies who want their hands in everything, want to climb everything including the damn wall and I am constantly after her AND the worst part of it, she doesn't sleep through the night....hence my constant feeling of exhaustion.

But in actual fact, if I have to stay awake EVERY night for the rest of my life, if I don't have to sleep at all just for her, I will without batting an eyelid because this love I feel is special.

Forget man and woman love. This mother-child love is higher than cocaine. Lmao.

All thanks be to God who has seen us through till this point!! If not for Him, where would we be? :)